Maybe I have commitment issues. Regardless, I was very hesitant to buy my first house two years ago. Something about living in an apartment, renting a house, living on the beach (I've done all of those at one time in my life) seems bold, carefree, and exciting. Buying a house seems boring, restricting, and mature.
I miss my first apartment in college with the dishwasher that we never used, couch that needed multiple blankets to conceal the holes, dirt, and questionable stains, and carpet designed during someone's LSD trip in the 70's. We never vacuumed in all our time there, we didn't even own one, we never mopped, no mop either, but we sure had a lot of fun, although we couldn't get our girlfriends to come inside.
So as the family and I packed the UHaul, waved goodbye to maintenance free living, drove 5 miles, and then unpacked for what seemed like 6 months, I was still reluctant to the idea of home ownership. Today, not much has changed. My wife has taught me how to clean, and sometimes I even do it, I have a toolbox with actual tools in it, and I even bought a ladder from Home Depot (Although I've never used it).
The one thing I enjoy about home ownership is mowing the lawn. This my 90 minutes, I have a small lawn but I'm slow, to let my mind wander and nature speak to me (OK, pretty much just the mind wandering thing). My son, Jace likes to come outside with me and play and pretend that he's mowing as well. It's a great time to stew over ideas and brainstorm over the hum of the mower. If Apple would develop an imower, I could type out these ideas as I'm mowing. PC guys could even use one of those manual mowers with the antiquated 3 blades that spin. they could even have a complicated booklet that confuses everyone. But back to the point...
So my mind is active and alert while I'm mowing, kind of like when you were first allowed to use a calculator in math class. And then, and this happens every time, one word will shatter my meditation. It's always my 5 year old calling out my first name, which I'm cool with, eager to show me a bug he found, tell me something he forgot to tell me 3 days ago, or ask me an important life question such as, "Why are aliens green?"
It's become habit for me to shut off my mower, get down on one knee, and say, "What do you need Jace?" Now this normally happens 2-3 times each time I mow. One day after I finished mowing, he came up to me and said, "Daddy, thanks for shutting off the mower to talk to me, that makes my heart dance." That made my heart dance.
Makes me think about the other machines in my life. The hum of busyness, programs, and goal-achieving that causes me to fall into patterns of putting people and relationships a distant second to ideas and strategies. I think this is the true meaning of anti-Christ: To put humanity below stuff.
So I bless you to put stuff back in its place, and return to listening to humanity.
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